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It's the New Moon in Capricorn and time for us all to find the yin/yang balance within. So for me, as an artist this means balancing my businesshead with my artheart and PAINTING!
Painting Notes:
Balancing art/life/biz
Picking up that brush and making that first stroke is EVERYTHING and NOTHING; bliss AND terror; both essential to reassure myself that I am indeed ALIVE.
One has to care deeply to paint from the soul.
It's the one year anniversary of my Process Painting experiment - yahoooo! One year ago today I began a series of paintings to save my life...no joke! Getting started, I literally ran full tilt in search of painting supplies so that I could begin that instant. I HAD TO PAINT. There was no choice. It was either paint or explode and so I chose to express my inner passions through the medium of acrylic painting. This time I wasn't painting small, but instead put my whole body into lifting, painting, making marks and covering paper, then silk, and then masonite sheets that were 4 foot by 4 foot (48" x 48") .
I obviously had a lot to say but words just weren't cutting it. As an artist I had to get it all out there through color and movement expressed in big, broad, splashy, sensual strokes, gouges and scratches painted to loud music: Celtic, Industrial, Acoustic, African, French...a mix, depending on my mood.
As the months went by I continued to paint, explore and express my feelings through art and writing that accompanied the paintings. That combination was new for me; one fed off the other. I combined the two in part because I wanted my blog readers to see what I was going through as I painted.
My friend Ian asked me if these paintings came from a metaphysical, meditative place within my soul and I had to answer 'no,
this series is pure emotion.
For those of you wondering what in the heck Process Painting is, I'll explain. Process Painting is painting without concern for anything but the process itself. This allows one to really focus on being present and in the moment without concern for where the painting will go afterward or if it will ever be sold. It's not easy for many of us to let go of control over outcome, so it felt risky and strange at first, but I grew to love it and crave it as time went on.
What I learned
By experimenting with Process Painting I gave myself permission to express my emotions out loud and in paint and how to be fully present.
I granted myself time, space and freedom for emotional outbursts and for believing in myself. I spent time just being and I spent time writing, painting, pondering, dancing and absorbing music. I could feel myself coming alive in every pore and I expressed that being-ness, that alive-ness through my creations; my paintings, my photographs of the paintings and my writing that accompanied each painting and finally through my blog posts which brought it all together.
Process Painting has put me back in touch with my emotions; joy and faith and strength and yes, pain.
I painted as if nothing else mattered but this being-ness, this process of painting. It was a reminder of what's really important for my spirit and my soul.
Painting abstractly encouraged me to translate my feelings very directly onto the canvas without worrying about depicting anything recognizable.
As for the future, I'm going to continue what I started one year ago today because frankly,
I am in love with process painting.
I created two slides shows (see below) documenting all the paintings I created between October 30th, 2009 and October 30th, 2010. You can check out the accompanying blog posts at Creative Soul Blog or read my original Art Mystic blog that was eventually abandoned half way through the year so that I could focus on my Creative Soul Blog instead (all posts are now on my Creative Soul Blog).
Let's not forget that this is also a 1 year BLOG PARTY so I encourage you to leave your comments below expressing how this post has inspired your creative soul. I plan to pick one lucky winner at the upcoming Full Moon in Taurus on Nov. 15th, 2010 and gift them with a card or two from this collection.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/kathycrabbe/sets/72157625176624687/show/
The love of life is all that remains. A shining star will appear somewhere.Salvino Nucera, Re Niliu~Pucambu
The fact is that I don't really care what becomes of these (recent) paintings of mine. I just need to do them.
Q & A
Q. So these paintings were created just for you?
Me: Yes, and no. I willingly share these fits of creative love, expression and heart with the world via my blog, so yes I do care about putting them out there into the world, but I'm not assigning any monetary value to them.
Q. What if someone wants one?
Me: They're not for sale. These paintings are part of one year of Process Painting and I won't have any answers for you until that year is up (some time in October, 2010) and even then I may not be ready to respond to that question.
Q. So why paint?
Me: Today, I was a bit down so I sat in front of a new white board (very large, by the way), played some music, wrote, pondered and eventually put brush to board and in the process felt better and stronger and then the painting process itself grew and morphed and became something in itself; the process carried me along with it. So basically I was able to make a choice: do I want to get out of this bad mood I'm in or stay in it.
Just click the link to see more art in process posts! Musical Ambiance: Planet Soup World Music Compilation
Are we waking up and discovering "Our shoe's don't fit anymore?" I know we sometimes feel and pray that hope, excitement, peace and love are possible on a world wide scale and on a personal level.
As we travel deep, deep into the center of our souls we release little time bombs, tick, tick, ticking...just waiting to wake us up and then, when we're not even close to being ready, they explode forcing us to face and own up to our shadow, and accept the truth of who we are. So, how do we face our demons?
Do you ever have moments where time just stops and then goes backwards? Or is that just longing for what was?
'All time is now' - sometimes I like this idea, although I can't explain it. Early morning, for example takes me back in time which often makes me sad and may be why I avoid it.
And if I feel a rage I won't deny it I won't fear love.
Sarah McLachlan, Fumbling Towards Ecstasy
Musical Ambiance: Sarah McLachlan - Fumbling Towards Ecstasy, Ingrid Karklins - Anima Mundi
Sometimes its sooooo hard to calm down and focus on painting, often due to feeling the pressure of everything else I have to do - I'm sure you know what I mean!
How I Calm & Center (a really quick meditation that WORKS!)
Close my eyes. Deep breath. Sit with eyes closed, just listening. Breathing deeply. Relaxing my body. Checking in and asking, "How do I feel?" Picking music that fits my mood (eg. The album "Flow, River of My Soul" by Single Gun Theory) Letting the music energize and sweep me up. And I'm OFF and painting!!!
"The time is now."
From the song "Transmission" by Single Gun Theory
In process - acrylic & charcoal on masonite - 48" x 48""Thank you forces of good, Thank you positivity, Thank you, joy." From the song "Metaphysical" by Single Gun Theory
The best feeling: like anything is possible!
Musical Ambiance: Flow, River of My Soul by Single Gun Theory